Tuesday, July 31, 2012

Lupron Shot Video

I decided to video a "how-to" tonight of myself doing my Lupron shot! I love documenting stuff. I've never done a video of my infertility process, so I figured, why not?! So here's the video! Ohh and if you're doing this, make sure you're careful in putting the cap back on the needle when you're done! The needle poked through tonight because I was moving too fast and it "bit" my finger! Ouch! A finger prick is much worse than any shot!! You'll see my ouch face right before the video shuts off! Haha 

Monday, July 30, 2012

Lupron Day #1

And it starts again. I was definitely nervous about giving myself a shot after 5 months! It's really not sore, we'll see how it looks tomorrow. And most importantly how I feel tomorrow! Last time I took this I was flu-like sick the whole day after! So fingers crossed I wake up feeling good :)

Positive aspects of being "infertile"

I saw this one of my facebook groups and had to repost to my blog!

So what if your uterus’ isn’t behaving! Who cares if your husband’s sperm has more tails than a dog! It doesn’t matter if you’re tubes have no idea how to fallop! Don’t feel sorry for us! There are lots of positive aspects to being an infertile such as….

(1) No awkward sex talk to your future children! Explaining the birds and the bees to our children will be fun! “Little Tommy, when a mommy and a daddy love each other they drive to a fertility clinic and 4 years later, you are conceived with a lot of love and a little test tube.” 

(2) By the time you are pregnant, your friends are already finished having kids. You can borrow all their baby stuff (even if they are stained with poop and vomit).

(3) During IVF or IUI, your partner doesn’t even have to be present during conception! Just send him a quick text once it’s done. “Honey, we did it! How was it for you?”

(4) When you go to sleep at night, you still get to sleep through the night.

(5) You get to cry about infertility in random places. Why go to a boring old grocery store if you’re just going to shop. Yawn. Boring. Having a emotional breakdown in the tampon aisle, now that’s interesting!

(6) Your friends all offer to let you have their bratty kids. Great! So don’t be surprised and call the police when you take them. You had a verbal agreement.

(7) When you’re quintuplets arrive, you might get your own television show called IVF Mama Plus Five!

(8) You get to have surgery to help improve your fertility…. The positive side? The hospital offers these delicious pudding cups for lunch! Lip-smacking!

(9) Your friend have stretch marks, sagging breasts and wrinkles. You only have weight gain and acne due to fertility medication.

(10) Whoever said infertility was awful obviously never met your hot fertility doctor! He can inseminate you anytime!

Even if it doesn’t always feel this way and you think you will never get pregnant, infertility is most likely temporary. But hope and determination are permanent.

This article was taken from 999 Reasons to Laugh at Infertility. This is a REALLY great website about all things infertility, it really does help one look at things differently.

Sunday, July 29, 2012

Boudoir Photo Shoot!! Ooohhh La La!

So I did a photo shoot last week as a confidence booster. I originally purchased this Groupon before our first IVF because I was so down & wanted to do something for myself. Then I found out I was pregnant & decided I'd hold off & do the shoot at 6 or 7 mos pregnant. When I lost Orville, I still had this to use by September. So on my birthday I had my consultation then went up there last Tuesday for the shoot. I lost 9 lbs just by eating better for this & to be a little healthier before my next IVF. They did my hair & makeup & then I had a 45 minute shoot that netted me 400 photos! The photographer made me feel so comfortable while being half naked! Ha! Here are a couple I'd like to share! Thank you to my friend Martina for editing a few for me :) I recommend this for anyone! :) Ohh and I am kind of convinced that these aren't really me! Haha

 Edited by Martina

 Edited by Martina

 Edited by Martina

 Edited by Martina

 That's just a shadow by the way, not my nipple! Haha


Wednesday, July 18, 2012

July 15, 2012

I forgot I wanted to make a post on here on Sunday and I forgot. I updated my Facebook, but since not everyone is on there, I wanted to share my status:

"Exactly 2 years ago today, Casey & I decided we would start a family. Little did we know we'd be here 24 months later childless after driving thousands of miles back & forth to buffalo, spending (idk how much) $, injecting myself with countless amounts of drugs, having prolly close to 100 ultrasounds & more bloodwork drawn than most have in their life, going under anesthesia 3 times, having many procedures & having an angel baby! Wow it's been a tough 2 years but we will prevail & have the child we deserve! I have the best husband for sticking by my side & being my rock thru thick & thin! ♥" 

Two years or 24 months is a long time - I've known people who have gotten pregnant and had 2 children during this time period! I never would've guessed that on July 15, 2010, it would have come to what it is today. No one could've prepared me for everything I would go through. Most people really have no idea what is involved with infertility. All the appointments, all the drugs, all the "poking and proding," it's just crazy. I put on 100 miles each trip I take to Buffalo, and I couldn't tell you how many appointments I've had up there. Each "easy" cycle was at least 5 times, my previous IVF cycle was at least 10 times. Crazy. Not much else I can say but crazy! Anyways, I'm hoping this is nearing the end of trying for our child. I really hope our next IVF cycle gets a happy, healthy baby in our arms. <3

Friday, July 13, 2012

IVF drugs

In case you were wondering, this is what 1 cycle of IVF looks like in drug form!

Saturday, July 7, 2012

Infertility Etiquette

So I've found a lot of articles lately about infertility etiquette and things not to say to people that are considered to be infertile. Yes, I did have a pregnancy, but it didn't have an outcome of a baby that I could hold in my arms, so I am still considered to be infertile and will be going through infertility treatments again to get the baby I deserve in my arms. Anyways, I found an article today that I really love through RESOLVE which is a national infertility organization. The link for the article is Infertility Etiquette and I'm going to highlight the points below and my thoughts on them (not all of them apply to our case, but they may apply to others).

1. Don't tell them to relax - this is probably one of the worst things someone can say to me. If you've ever been through this, you would know it's not possible to just relax, no it's not going to happen if I just relax. "Couples who are able to conceive after a few months of "relaxing" are not infertile...The woman feels like she is doing something wrong when, in fact, there is a good chance that there is a physical problem preventing her from becoming pregnant." Relaxing will honestly do me no good. I DO NOT ovulate on my own. We don't know if I ever will, guess what? It takes ovulation to make a baby!

2. Don't minimize the problem - this just kind of goes with the relaxing point above. Unfortunately, there is a problem, I wish there wasn't one, but there is. Yes, we know what comes with having a child, it doesn't make us feel better when you say "take advantage of sleeping in while you can" and anything else because honestly, I'd rather be getting no sleep right now than be childless. 

3. Don't say there are worse things that could happen - how would this possibly be comforting? "To a woman whose sole goal in life has been to love and nurture a child, infertility may indeed be the "worst" thing that could happen." Having a miscarriage for me was the worse thing that could have happened after going through 24 months of fertility treatments. The fact I have to go through infertility treatments again is definitely not ideal.

4. Don't say they aren't meant to be parents - Honestly I can't believe people would say this. "If God were in the business of divinely sterilizing women, don't you think he would prevent the pregnancies that end in abortions? Or wouldn't he sterilize the women who wind up neglecting and abusing their children? Even if you aren't religious, the "maybe it's not meant to be" comments are not comforting. Infertility is a medical condition, not a punishment from God or Mother Nature." Even though at times I feel that I'm being punished.

5. Don't ask why they aren't trying IVF - Well we are, so this wouldn't bother me. But I know it does bother people when they're going through the other treatments, because we've been there, done that. And here we are, IVF. 

6. Don't be crude - this should just go without saying...

7. Don't Complain About Your Pregnancy - this is the BIGGEST problem I'm having right now after my miscarriage. It bothered me before I got pregnant, but the way it bothers me now is way worse! I want to be puking. I want to be unbelievably uncomfortable in this hot summer we're having. I want to have the glucose testing and every other thing pregnant women complain about. So please, think about someone going through infertility treatments or someone who's suffered a miscarriage before you complain about your pregnancy "problems." "You have every right to vent about the discomforts to any one else in your life, but don't put your infertile friend in the position of comforting you. Your infertile friend would give anything to experience the discomforts you are enduring because those discomforts come from a baby growing inside of you. When I heard a pregnant woman complain about morning sickness, I would think, "I'd gladly throw up for nine straight months if it meant I could have a baby." When a pregnant woman would complain about her weight gain, I would think, 'I would cut off my arm if I could be in your shoes.'"

8. Don't treat them like they are ignorant - we are not ignorant! We know how much responsibility is involved in parenthood! We're going through all these treatments because we know that and want a child. "The length of time you spend waiting for that baby does not factor in to your appreciation of responsibility. If anything, people who have been trying to become pregnant longer have had more time to think about those responsibilities."

9. Don't gossip about your friend's condition - I don't mind people telling other people what we're going through, I'm completely open about it, but remember that many others are not. Plus gossiping does nobody good. 

10. Don't push adoption (yet) - Yes, we know this is an option but please do not push this yet. We are trying everything in our power to have biological children before we will consider adoption. Since we aren't to the point where we're considering adoption, I'll skip the last couple of points. We now know that I can get pregnant which is a big step forward for us. I'm hoping that we will have a biological baby in our arms in no time, but there's not a definite, and we know that. Just please support us in all of our decisions. 

Please keep these in mind, we would greatly appreciate it as well as anyone else you may know going through infertility treatments. It's a hard thing to go through. People that have never gone through the treatments simply won't understand what we're going through, so please try to remember that. There is etiquette when it comes to almost anything, this is the infertility etiquette.