The Two Week Wait

Ahh the two week wait (2ww), anyone whose seriously trying to have a baby or going through the infertility process knows exactly what the 2ww is. Sometimes the 2ww is shorter or longer than 2 weeks depending on what you end up doing or what the doctors end up deciding. Either way, it's complete torture. The 2ww is the time between ovulation and "Aunt Flow (AF)" (your period)/positive pregnancy test. For those going through IVF the 2ww can be the time between the egg retrieval or embryo transfer and whenever your doctor decides to do the test. During this dreaded wait, you over-analyze every little thing! Even if it's something that literally happens every day, all of a sudden you're wondering if it's a pregnancy symptom. It is complete mind torture. It's a mind game, that's what it is, for me I play a mind game with myself for most of the 2ww, it's hard not too, especially if you've been through it before and have actually gotten a positive. Also, progesterone can mess with your "symptoms" as well, it can make you believe you have pregnancy symptoms when really, they're symptoms from your daily hormones.

Here are some of the mind games that happen:

• All of a sudden you notice a funny smell, yup you must be pregnant. 
• OMG you have an upset stomach, that's definitely a pregnancy symptom (even though you're prone to upset stomachs), but it's different this time.
• You're cramping...now this one goes back and forth. One second you're pregnant, the next you're fully convinced that this didn't work and you're going to have to do this all over again.
• You get a 5 second burst of heartburn, yup you must be pregnant because you only get heartburn when you're pregnant.
• You get a headache every day for a few days, that's definitely a pregnancy symptom.
• And the list goes on...

Sounds fun, huh? On top of all the "symptoms," I refuse to take a home pregnancy test. I am one of a minority here as many TTC (trying to conceive) people are POAS (pee-on-a-stick) addicts! They start testing the second they inject the trigger (which contains HCG) so they can see when the HCG leaves their system, so they know for real when they get a positive. I stopped POAS a LONG time ago! I got so sick of "being slapped in the face twice" (negative test, then AF), that I decided to stop using them all together. So while I'm analyzing every little thing, I refuse to POAS. So it's truly a waiting game. The day of beta (HCG blood draw) is the longest day of your life. Time moves slower than you could ever imagine because you honestly have no clue what to expect. You've convinced yourself so many times you're pregnant, then convinced yourself so many times that you're not pregnant, that you honestly don't know what's going to happen. So you continue wondering until you get the phone call...did it work? or did it not work? Only time will tell...